Advice On Fatherhood

The words here are dedicated to all the current and future fathers out there, especially to my three sons, Caleb, Jesse, and Noah, and to my future son-in law. I’m 52 (soon to be 53) years old. I’ve been married to my wife Michelle for nearly 25 years now. One of the greatest joys of my life is being the father to Caleb (20), Jesse (18), Caroline (16), and Noah (13).

I’ve by no means been the perfect father. I’ve made countless mistakes and almost certainly have other mistakes—though I hope far fewer—awaiting me. Through my personal experiences, through the numerous wise men and women with whom God has graced my life—especially my parents and my wife’s parents—and above all, through the wisdom of God, I’ve learned some things when it comes to fatherhood that I would like to pass on.

Stay Sexually Pure

There’s probably no quicker way to destroy a marriage these days than through sexual immorality. C.S. Lewis was right when he wrote, “There is no getting away from it: the old Christian rule is, ‘Either marriage, with complete faithfulness to your partner, or else total abstinence.’” Lewis was also correct we he noted that this is the most unpopular of all the Christian virtues.

Lewis wrote those words in the middle of the 20^th century, many years prior to the rampant spread of pornography and the evil LGBTMYNAMEISLEGION agenda, and decades before the internet. In other words, as unpopular as chastity was when Lewis was speaking and writing on such matters, given how easy and acceptable it is today to live contrary to God’s teaching on sex and marriage, it is even more unpopular now. Yet, the truth remains.

Be faithful to your wives men, before and during marriage. Flee from pornography and the like. Seek reliable sexual accountability before and during marriage. Have no secrets in this area from your wife. Make sure she has complete access to every digital device you own. If and when you fail—and you almost certainly will have some failures—confess, repent, and seek help if necessary. Also, model and teach your children the truth in these grave matters.

Spend Time With Your Family

I’ve been blessed with many friends throughout my life. However, there is no one that I would rather spend time with than my wife and kids. I almost never “hang out” with anyone other than my family. Not that there’s anything inherently wrong with friends outside of your family, but always make your family the priority. Do what they enjoy, even if it conflicts with what you would rather do. Love is far more than what we feel or say. Let your actions communicate your love for your wife and children. Time is a precious commodity. Spend it on abundantly on your wife and kids.

Work and Provide!

One of the greatest lessons I’ve learned from my father is the value and importance of hard work and providing for one’s family. In their early years, our children most need time with their mothers. It is tremendously important that men do all possible to allow for this. By American standards, Michelle and I are far from wealthy. Throughout our marriage, the vast majority of our income has come from my work as a teacher of mathematics. Typically, one doesn’t get wealthy through working as a teacher.

Nevertheless, from the moment Caleb exited his mothers’ womb—over 20 years ago—until today, with rare exception, Michelle has been a stay-at-home mom. She has been able to earn some income working from home, and she has at times, now that our kids are older, worked outside the home.

However, it has been more common for me to take on extra work. For most of the past decade, as life has gotten more expensive, and in order for Michelle to remain at home, I have worked multiple jobs. We still can’t afford to purchase new cars, and we don’t take fancy vacations, and the like, but we are able to provide our children with far more than what most kids across the world receive. Most importantly, our kids have grown up with their parents present in their lives, and are very close to us and one another as a result.

Be a Man!

No doubt you’ve encountered the notion of “toxic masculinity.” For the most part, this is simply another attack from the modern left on traditional Christian values. For example, much of what I write in this column will be despised by today’s leftists and will be attributed to my “toxic masculinity.” As Ben Shapiro wrote in 2017,

The goal of the Left, therefore, becomes to train boys not to become men. Instead, boys should be feminized; they should never be encouraged to “be a man.” …

If men are not trained by good men, they will be trained by bad men; if they have no good males to follow, they follow bad ones. The Left routinely speaks about a world run by women and why such a world would create better men. But the most male-free environment in America exists in black communities, where well over half of black children grow up without fathers. This hasn’t made black boys less violent; it’s made them far more prone to criminality than their non-black peers. Many of these boys follow teenage role models, many of whom have lacked fathers themselves, and lack the training to be a gentleman.

To “be a man,” it is important to remember that this is not just about physical strength and hard work, but about being a “gentleman”: being patient, kind, giving, and above all, loving. Got Questions puts it this way,

A true man is someone who has “put away childish things.” A true man knows what is right and stands firm in the right. A true man is a godly man. He loves the Lord, he loves life, and he loves those whom the Lord has entrusted to his care.

Be a Good Husband

As I’ve often pointed out, the biblical family model is at the foundation of every institution in the history of humanity. Thus, the importance of the family is paramount. Of course, the enemy of all mankind knows this well. This is why I believe that the hardest two jobs in the world are being a good parent and being a good spouse. As I’ve often said before, after our relationship with our Creator, the most important relationship in the universe is the relationship between a husband and his wife.

In other words, men, if you want things right between you and your children, you need to have things right with your wife. Prioritize your relationship with your wife! Your children need to see a proper, loving, healthy relationship with their parents. This will bring them much peace and joy (whether they even realize it at the time or not) and will be a tremendous help to them as they embark on their own marriages.

Lastly, and Most Importantly: Follow Jesus

The greatest model for what it means to be a good earthly father is the model provided for us by our Heavenly Father. Christians believe that God sent His “one and only Son,” Jesus Christ into the world to save the world. God gave of Himself in the most precious way possible in order to do for those He loves what it was impossible for us to do for ourselves.

God’s greatest gift met humanity’s most desperate need. In His earthly walk, Jesus modeled love, forgiveness, patience, kindness, generosity, strength, wisdom, and so on, like no else who has ever lived or will ever live. The more you are like Him, the better husband and father you will be.

Copyright 2022, Trevor Grant Thomas
At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason.
www.trevorgrantthomas.com
Trevor is the author of the The Miracle and Magnificence of America
trevorgrantthomas@gmail.com

For Children, "Two Parents" Is Not Enough

Yesterday in the Washington Post, George Will again reminded us of  Daniel Patrick Moynihan's 50 year-old study, "The Negro Family: The Case for National Action." In his piece, Will uses Moynihan's conclusions to again remind us of the importance of the "two-parent" family model. "The assumption that the condition of the poor must improve as macroeconomic conditions improve was to be refuted by a deepened understanding of the crucial role of the family as the primary transmitter of the social capital essential for self-reliance and betterment," said Will.

Do we really need studies and data to show us what common sense and sound morality has always revealed? A culture that continues to ignore Scripture and depart from biblical truths does. Although, like the biblical account of the rich man and Lazarus, even if the ghost of Moynihan himself appeared with his study--and a thousand others like it--in hand, it seems that most liberals today would continue to deny the truth.

In focusing mainly on economic outcomes, Will conveniently left out an extremely important fact for children when it comes to the presence of two parents in the home. Given the tragic and perverse turn we've taken with marriage in our culture, this truth cannot be ignored. It's not simply two parents, with the implied dual incomes, that are necessary for the proper upbringing of children. Ridiculous as it is to have to say (again, and again, and again), children need a mother and a father. Of course, preferably their biological mother and father in a healthy marital relationship.

There are factors far more important than those in the economic realm when it comes to the family. And just as the work of Moynihan and many others has revealed the sad economic outcomes for children raised outside of the biblical family model, there is a mountain of research that reveals the same sad outcomes for these children in everything from education, to mental health, physical health, sexuality, criminal behavior, and so on.

Though liberals can somehow deduce a link between (supposed) rising global temperatures, and the rise of the likes of ISIS, the plain eternal truths on marriage, family, and children seems to escape them. When discussing the family, conservatives like Mr. Will would do well to remember this.

Copyright 2015, Trevor Grant Thomas
At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason.
www.trevorgrantthomas.com
Trevor and his wife Michelle are the authors of: Debt Free Living in a Debt Filled World
tthomas@trevorgrantthomas.com

Liberals and "the least of these"

As America endures a massive invasion of illegal immigrants at our southern border, many liberals, whether in the media or on Capitol Hill, are attempting to claim the moral high ground in this matter and remind us that this is all about “the children.”

Slamming those protesting and blocking buses attempting to bring the illegal immigrants into their communities, CNN anchor Ashleigh Banfield, full of false piety, declared “It’s devastating. And God help if you’re ever in need of help and you show up and there’s a bus telling you to get out. This is America. Just read what we’re about.” Jesse Jackson said that “getting support for those children in the humanitarian crisis is the moral and right thing to do.”

Nancy Pelosi went so far as to lecture us that “every person has a spark of divinity in them, and is therefore worthy of respect – what we saw in those rooms was [a] dazzling, sparkling, array of God's children, worthy of respect.”

It is no surprise that the left in America would stoop to using children as pawns in their never-ending quest for political supremacy. When you are willing to take positions that call for the killing of the most vulnerable among us—those in the womb—are there any depths to which one wouldn’t sink?

Obama demonstrated such willingness before he got elected President. Back in 2008, after he described his daughter’s hypothetical pregnancy as a “punishment,” and several weeks prior to the election, candidate Barack Obama was asked by pastor Rick Warren what he thought was, “the greatest moral failure of America.” Obama responded with, “I think America’s greatest moral failure in my lifetime has been that we still don’t abide by that basic precept in Matthew that whatever you do for the least of my brothers, you do for me…”

In justifying their votes for Obamacare, like-minded liberals used similar reasoning.

It is appallingly duplicitous that liberals, whether referencing the “least of us,” or calling for government action on behalf of “the children,” are never talking about the unborn. Whatever moral causes one chooses to champion, nothing compares to the helplessness of an unborn child. In other words, there is no one among us more “least” than the unborn. It is the height of hypocrisy for liberals to preach about “social justice” and reference the “least of us,” while supporting policies which have led to the slaughter of millions still in their mothers’ wombs.

Such duplicity would be enough for any reasonable God-fearing person to abandon liberalism, but sadly this hypocrisy doesn’t stop with abortion. As has been noted ad nauseam, for decades liberals have wrought havoc on the American family and traditional (biblical) American values. In other words, tens-of-millions of American children have suffered and continue to suffer terribly under the Big Government policies of liberals. As Jesse Jackson himself recently noted (see link above), Chicago, like many other American urban areas dominated by liberal politics, is a tremendously dangerous place, especially for young people, and in dire need of help.

Ironically, Jackson, his fellow race pimps, publicity prostitutes, and other like-minded liberals, have helped make black neighborhoods the most dangerous places in the U.S. (Eight of the top 25 are neighborhoods in Detroit and Chicago.) Rarely do liberals look to the biggest reason for the existence of such chaos: the breakdown of the family. (Such breakdown has especially harmed black families.) Instead, they insanely continue to promote politics that directly attack the traditional (biblical) American family.

As was noted on American Thinker last year, in dozens of large cities (pop. 50,000+) all across America—from Savannah to Atlanta, Washington D.C., Philadelphia, Baltimore, Hartford, Buffalo, Cleveland, Cincinnati, St. Louis, Milwaukee, and Detroit—more than half of all families are led by single parents, with the numbers for minorities—especially blacks, being significantly higher.

Of course, most of these single parent homes are led by mothers. The absence of dad is devastating for children in a wide variety of ways. Children from single-parent homes are twice as likely to be suspended or expelled from school and are more than twice as likely to be arrested for a juvenile crime. According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, 85% of children with behavioral disorders don’t have a father at home.

Children living without dad are much more likely to abuse drugs, commit suicide, and run away from home. They are more likely to have lower academic achievement along with lower self-esteem. Children born to unwed mothers are about seven times more likely to live in poverty than children with fathers in the home. The correlation between fatherless homes and the negative effects on the family is irrefutable.

Of course, similar irrefutable conclusions with motherless homes can be drawn as well. Thus, despite a recent bogus attempt at painting same-sex parenting as normal and healthy for children, most studies show what common sense and sound morality already reveal: children are always best served by a loving and married mother and father in the home.

What’s more, as has been noted before, the same-sex marriage movement is nothing more than a means to an end: the full-on legitimization of homosexuality. With full legal protection, homosexuality, in all of its forms and in spite of its extreme dangers, is being promoted as normal and healthy. Of course, school children are targets.

In addition to destroying the biblical family model, another favorite cause of liberals, man-made global warming, which, of course requires Big Government solutions, also set its sights on children. Since 1970, when the “Earth Day” nonsense began, American school children have been targets as well as pawns (“Save the planet—for the children!”).

For decades now, liberals have shamelessly used children, as well as other vulnerable citizens, to further their Big Government agenda. At the same time, supporting and/or promoting everything from the welfare state, to same-sex marriage, homosexuality, homosexual adoption, transgenderism, pornography, abortion, global warming, and so on, liberals have waged continuous war on the biblical family and biblical values. Of course, “the least” of us, “the children,” suffer the most. Remember this the next time a Democrat and their lackeys in the media want to take action “for the children.”

(See this column on American Thinker.)

Copyright 2014, Trevor Grant Thomas

At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason.
Trevor and his wife Michelle are the authors of: Debt Free Living in a Debt Filled World
tthomas@trevorgrantthomas.com

Why We're Raising "Duck Dynasty" Boys, and Not "Pajama" Boys

After Phil Robertson told the truth to GQ Magazine (though in a rather colorful way) about homosexuality, liberals went into their predictable hypocritical hyperventilations. While slamming Robertson’s (and essentially the Bible’s) views on homosexuality and sin (which are shared by ten-of-millions of Americans), liberals completely ignored (read: had absolutely no problem with) what were by far the most offensive things in the GQ column.

Authored by Drew Magary, the column is replete with dripping sarcasm along with plenty of vulgar and foul language. In the very first paragraph, referring to Mr. Robertson’s large crossbow, Magary says “It looks like you could shoot through a god—mn mountain with it.”  Of course, if one doesn’t believe what the Bible says anyway, what harm is there in swearing with God’s name?

Just two sentences later, Magary writes, “The bow is cocked and loaded, just in case a deer stumbles in front of us and we need to do a redneck drive-by on the poor b-stard…” The f-bomb is dropped more than once, along with several other foul words and crude references. Seemingly, none of this bothers the left. No, they are offended by Scripture quotations that contradict their liberal worldview.

As Matt Lewis of the Daily Caller points out, such a worldview much prefers “Pajama Boy” to the boys of Duck Dynasty. As Lewis noted in his column, “There is a huge schism between red state America and blue state America, and these two stories seem to symbolize the yawning chasm.” However wide this chasm, as a father of four, three of whom are boys (ages 5, 9, and 11), one thing is clear to me: I’m raising “Duck Dynasty” boys, not “Pajama” boys.

Now, my boys love their cozy pajamas and hot chocolate, but they are also learning to shoot (guns and bows), hunt, and fish. Last Christmas I gave my two older boys junior compound bows. This year they have fished for and caught crappie and trout. My two older boys also won a “Turkey Shoot” with BB guns—the prize being a frozen turkey—at a local fall festival this year. Below is a recent photo of our boys with our only daughter Caroline, which my wife proudly posted on Facebook along with the caption shown.

"You may come calling boys, but you must meet my brothers first."

Don’t worry, libs, along with our children’s outdoor exploits, our home has an extensive library of hundreds of books. My wife, who is in charge of homeschooling our four children, has made sure of that. Each of our three older children, including our daughter, also takes karate and piano classes. So along with learning how to clean a trout, this year Caleb, Jesse, and Caroline learned to play a “Mozart Themed” Sleigh-ride.

I have an undergraduate degree in physics and two graduate degrees in mathematics education. I have taught mathematics in public and private schools for 20 years. My wife has an undergraduate degree in sociology, graduated summa cum laude, and was valedictorian of her college class. She has also recently authored a book. Our children will receive one of the best K-12 educations of any child in the country.

I’m not nearly the outdoorsman that the Robertsons are, and my wife can’t stand camouflage, but whether my children prefer sipping hot chocolate (like Uncle Si, I prefer sweet tea) or shooting a gun, most importantly, our children are being taught from a Christian worldview.

Yes, that means that among other things, they are learning that, along with adultery, fornication, and bestiality, homosexual behavior is sin. They are also learning that they are created in the image and likeness of God, and that all human life, from the moment of conception, is especially precious. And they are learning that in the world today, both abortion and homosexuality are uniquely heinous.

Why the focus on these two particular issues? Because the greatest lie ever told is that there is no God. The second greatest lie ever told is that the devil does not exist. The third greatest lie ever told is that your sin (and mine) is not really sin, and this is exactly what is happening with homosexuality and abortion.

For decades in the U.S. there has been a movement spearheaded by many well-funded organizations devoted to preaching the value and legitimacy of abortion, homosexuality, and a redefining of marriage. In other words, tens of millions of Americans have been preached the lie that homosexual behavior and killing a child in the womb are not sin. My children are learning the truth in these grave matters.

As Joel Belz of World Magazine noted several years ago, it is time for conservative Christians to “stop apologizing” for the attention we give the issues of homosexuality and abortion. Like Phil Robertson, it is time for more Christian celebrities to take on these issues. Time and again we see homosexuality portrayed in music, movies, and television as nothing but normal, acceptable behavior.

There is virtually NOTHING in the secular media that portrays the other side of homosexuality and similar issues. Such absence impacts our culture. There is no doubt that public opinion on homosexuality and same-sex marriage has been swayed toward a more liberal view of these matters in no small part due to the media campaign that favors them.

If we stay silent, what happens? Television networks will pull the Phil Robertsons (and the Craig Jameses) from the air. Of course, supposedly networks such as Fox and A&E have the “right” to make such decisions, but photographers, bakers, and florists with Christian views on homosexuality and marriage don’t. Such small businesses are sued and even held liable by our courts for refusing services to same-sex couples.

Even worse, once the homosexual agenda (which, we must not forget includes those who are “transgendered”) has the full force of the law behind it, public schools will teach that homosexual behavior and same-sex marriage are good and right. In school systems like Los Angeles, it’s already happening. Likewise, schools (certainly public, probably private as well) will be forced to accommodate “transgendered” children.

What’s more, state constitutions that have amendments defining marriage as a union of one man and one woman are proving to be not enough to stop the homosexual agenda from progressing on the marriage front. Just days ago, a federal judge ruled Utah’s ban on same-sex marriage unconstitutional. Like almost all of the 28 other states with similar bans, in 2004 the citizens of Utah passed the ban by an overwhelming 66% to 34% majority.

If America wants to stop this madness where good is called evil and evil is called good, we must change our culture. This fight begins with our families. Liberals know this. This is why almost exclusively the “culture wars” being fought in the U.S. are an attack on the family. In other words, if we want to change our culture, we better start raising our kids with a worldview like that of the cast of Duck Dynasty instead of the worldview that govern “Pajama Boy” and his big sister, Julia.

(See this column on American Thinker.)

Copyright 2013, Trevor Grant Thomas

At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason

Trevor and his wife Michelle are the authors of: Debt Free Living in a Debt Filled World

tthomas@trevorgrantthomas.com

On Parenting and Family, Bill O’Reilly Should Tell the Complete Story

With his latest column, Bill O’Reilly has weighed in on (as have so many, including me) the Miley Cyrus “demon-in-heat” (with her hair-horns and gyrations, isn’t that what she wanted us to think?) MTV dance debacle. Instead of completely focusing on the former Disney darling, Mr. O’Reilly takes parents to task—and, indirectly at least, accuses Miley’s father, Billy Ray Cyrus, of bad parenting.

“[There’s] an epidemic of bad parenting going on in America,” said O’Reilly. He’s right. With over 20 years of experience teaching in American high schools (public and private), the bad behavior—which is certainly no uncommon thing these days—of almost every troubled or struggling kid that I’ve encountered can be traced back to his or her home. As I’ve often noted, the breakdown of the family is deadly for America, or any nation.

Mr. O’Reilly also mentions the “collapse of the traditional family.” I wonder where he got his idea for the “traditional family?” Does Mr. O’Reilly believe that children should be raised by a loving mother and a father? Does he believe that both parents are necessary in the proper rearing of our nation’s children? It sure sounds like this is the case.

I wonder if O’Reilly considers the attempts (and successes) at redefining marriage in this nation as an attack on the “traditional family.” I mean, part of the whole premise of the position behind the pro-same-sex marriage crowd is that children don’t really need a mother and a father. This is how adoption laws got changed, and such a position also played a role in courts deciding that men can legally marry men, and women can legally marry women.

Where did Mr. O’Reilly get his notions on family and parenting? I would think that the Bible would have informed him, but surely that could not be the case. Remember, earlier this year, O’Reilly said, “If you’re going to stand up for heterosexual marriage, and exclude gay marriage if you’re going to do that, you’ve gotta do it outside the Bible. You can’t cite the Bible, because you’ll lose if you do.”

Seemingly unaware of his hypocrisy, Mr. O’Reilly bemoaned the fact that, “the powers that be are mostly afraid to mention the collapse of the traditional family, because secular-progressives attack any judgmental behavior on the part of a politician.” I suppose O’Reilly doesn’t consider that calling Christians who oppose same-sex marriage on biblical principles “Bible thumpers” is an attack on “judgmental behavior.”

I hate to pile on, but Mr. O’Reilly also noted that, “Sociologists well understand that chaos at home causes violent behavior, educational failure and social alienation among children.” I wonder (yes, O’Reilly causes one to “wonder” much with this piece) how his children are coping. It is now well known that Mr. O’Reilly and his former wife Maureen McPhilmy have gone through a very nasty divorce, with their two children caught right in the middle.

You see, the “truth is” that divorce has done a great deal more than same-sex marriage in wreaking devastation upon America’s children. Both are a plague on our culture, and are “gravely harming this nation.” I know very little of the circumstances of the O’Reilly-McPhilmy divorce. I am not claiming that, because of his divorce, Bill O’Reilly has no right to discuss family issues. However, as a very public figure with a large microphone, he would do well, as he encourages Billy Ray Cyrus, to note his own shortcomings and tell the complete story (even using some Scripture) when it comes to the breakdown of the family.

Copyright 2013, Trevor Grant Thomas

At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason

Trevor and his wife Michelle are the authors of: Debt Free Living in a Debt Filled World

tthomas@trevorgrantthomas.com

The Dangers of Homosexual Parenting

A pair of new studies reveal the dangers of homosexual parenting. From Focus on the Family on June 11:

“A pair of studies published today in the journal Social Science Research turns the widely accepted notion that kids raised by parents in same-sex relationships grow up to become well-adjusted adults on its ear.

According to data from the New Family Structures Study, led by Mark Regnerus at the University of Texas at Austin, children raised by homosexual parents are dramatically more likely than peers raised by married heterosexual parents to suffer from a host of social problems. Among them are strong tendencies, as adults, to exhibit poor impulse control; suffer from depression and thoughts of suicide; need mental health therapy; identify themselves as homosexual; choose cohabitation; be unfaithful to partners; contract sexually transmitted diseases; be sexually molested; have lower income levels; drink to get drunk; and smoke tobacco and marijuana.”

Also, according to Dr. Keith Ablow from Fox News:

“A careful analysis of the research studies that led the American Psychological Association (in 2005) to assert that the children of gay and lesbian parents are in no way disadvantaged, compared to the children of heterosexual parents, has concluded those studies were inadequate. According to Dr. Loren Marks, Associate Professor at Louisiana State University, who authored the analysis: “The available data, which are drawn from small convenience samples, are insufficient to support a strong generalizable claim...such a statement would not be grounded in science.”

Of course, no new studies are really necessary for anyone with any truly objective sense to understand that the best model of parenthood is the “stable, two-parent biological married model” Millennia of civilizations have proved this, and good governments for millennia have realized that it benefits a culture to promote such relationships.

Copyright 2012, Trevor Grant Thomas

At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason.
Trevor and his wife Michelle are the authors of: Debt Free Living in a Debt Filled World
tthomas@trevorgrantthomas.com

Where's Outrage for Travis Henry

Michael Vick has pleaded guilty. Let justice be done. From all indications it seems that it will be. Along with our judicial system, everyone from U.S. Senators, to the NFL, the media, corporate America, and the public in general have let their voices be heard in this matter. Michael Vick has been keenly condemned, with adjectives such as “cruel,” “sadistic,” “barbaric,” “cannibalistic,” “inhumane,” “abhorrent,” “reprehensible,” and “incomprehensible” used to describe his behavior.

The words and actions of those condemning Vick make me wonder where all this passion is when the lives of human beings are at stake. Former congressman J.C Watts pondered the same in an article he wrote recently, comparing the barbarism of dog-fighting to the barbarism of abortion. He pointed out that, “our culture has degenerated to a level where our priorities are so out of whack, that we decry ‘from mountain to mountain and valley to valley’ the mistreatment of innocent animals, while we turn a collective and legislative blind eye to the premature and yes, barbaric killing of human life in the name of ‘choice.’” Amen.

Recent developments with another NFL athlete give an additional interesting situation to contemplate. I wonder what the individuals and organizations so stirred by Vick’s actions think of the Denver Broncos’ tailback, Travis Henry. On Friday August 24 the Atlanta Journal Constitution reported that Henry has fathered nine children by nine different women across at least four different states. Talk about incomprehensible.

After Vick’s official admission of guilt, Goodell fired off a letter to him saying in part, “You have engaged in conduct detrimental to the welfare of the NFL and have violated the league's personal conduct policy.” ESPN reported on August 29 that Henry will not be disciplined by the NFL, saying that, “The league has clamped down on off-field misbehavior under commissioner Roger Goodell. But the newly implemented personal conduct policy ‘generally covers criminal violations, not civil matters’ such as Henry's, NFL spokesman Greg Aiello said Wednesday.”

Henry’s actions may not be very detrimental to the welfare of the NFL, but they are likely to be devastating to the nine children he has helped bring into this world.

Glenn T. Stanton, Director of Global Insights and Trends and Senior Analyst for Marriage and Sexuality at Focus on the Family (www.family.org), writes that, “All things being equal, children with married parents consistently do better in every measure of well-being than their peers who have single, cohabiting, divorced or step-parents, and this is a stronger indicator than parental race, economic or educational status, or neighborhood. The literature on this is broad and strong.” He bolsters this statement by noting that children living with their biological parents have, on average, higher test scores and grade point averages, and miss fewer school days than their peers not living with both biological parents. Also, they receive professional help for behavior and psychological problems at half the rate of children not living with both biological parents.

He adds that kids living with never-married mothers are twice as likely to be expelled or suspended from school as their peers, and those not living with both biological parents are 45 to 95 percent more likely to require parent/teacher conferences to deal with performance or behavior problems than those who live with married parents. And last, one of the most powerful predictors of crime rates comes from such family measures as the percentage of the population divorced, the percentage of households headed by women, and the percentage of unattached individuals in the community. It appears to me that the ultimate consequences of Vick’s actions will pale in comparison to those of Travis Henry.

Many do not like the comparison of Vick’s and Henry’s situations. They contend that Michael Vick was in violation of the law, while Travis Henry has broken no laws. However, it is interesting to note that Georgia’s law against fornication was stuck down by its Supreme Court only four years ago. The Washington Post reported in 2004 that 24 states still had laws against adultery, along with ten states still having anti-fornication statutes. Granted, most of these laws, if they still exist, are not enforced, but it goes to show that there was a time when we considered such acts criminal.

What does it say about our culture when one man can be so vilified by the public and the media, punished by his employer, and sent to jail by our justice system mostly because of abusing animals, while another man (along with the women involved) put nine human beings in the detrimental position of growing up in broken homes with no consequences other than being financially responsible for them?

Copyright 2014, Trevor Grant Thomas
At the Intersection of Politics, Science, Faith, and Reason.
Trevor and his wife Michelle are the authors of: Debt Free Living in a Debt Filled World
tthomas@trevorgrantthomas.com